Captain America

Steve Rogers (Chris Evans) volunteers to take part in an experimental programme that turns him into a super hero - Captain America.

A classic super hero movie that relies on a winning recipe. Nevertheless, it's a roller coaster ride of adrenaline-fuelled fun that gets particularly good towards the end when it clearly sets itself up for The Avengers which sadly, will probably be rubbish.




3 elephants

The A-Team

A group of war veterans framed for a crime they didn't commit, try to clear their names.

Great acting, especially by Sharlto Copley as Murdoch, but the movie felt old and tired and uninspiring. Like it had all been done before - which it had.
Franchise format:
1. Come up with basic plot that can be easily understood.
2. Pay a special effects company millions of dollars to come up with a big CGI filled battle scene.
3. Leave the ending ambiguous in case you want to do a sequel.

But, on the other hand, a fun film that you can go see with your mates or kids and don't have to follow intently.
So it isn't all bad. Just a bit boring....

2 elephants

Pineapple Express

A process server and his drug dealer go on the run from hitmen and a corrupt police officer when he accidentally witnesses a murder.

The chemistry between Seth Rogen and James Franco works - well. And this has to be Franco's one finest hours. He shines as the hippy drug dealing Saul Silver. We're taken on a ride as Rogen and Franco haplessly try to escape their pursuers while mostly high as kites.

While there are only a few laugh out loud moments the movie is HIGHLY enjoyable. Easy to watch. And the running gag which involves their indestructible friend 'Red' (Danny McBride) is really funny.

Overall a fun movie to watch especially at 4:20

3 elephants

Inception

Imagine a world where technology exists that allows you to enter a human mind through dream invasion.

This film was awesome. I mean like really awesome. Like really, really awesome. Like totally awesomely, awesome! And we're not telling you anymore because we don't want to spoil it (not that anyone reads this blog) So if you haven't seen this movie, go and see it now. I mean NOW. RIGHT NOW!

we're not going to put how many elephants in case this is a dream but it is a high number, possibly a herd.

From Paris With Love

In Paris, James Reese (Jonathan Rhys Meyers) a young employee of the U.S. Embassy is sent to look after the insane and erratic American spy Charlie Wax (John Travolta) whose mission is to stop a terrorist attack.

Produced by Luc Besson this movie is packed with the most excessive and ludicrous gun fighting and violence that it is actually quite brilliant and one of the best action films we've seen in quite awhile. Totally love it and we hope there is a sequel, if only John Travolta can be bothered.

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Best lines:
James Reece: I'm not your driver. I'm your partner.
Charlie Wax: Yeah, you're the chess player. I read your file.
James Reece: You play?
Charlie Wax: Do I look like I play board games?

The Book Of Eli

A post-apocalyptic world in which a lone man fights his way across American in order to protect a sacred book.

Denzel Washington is easy to watch. As loner, Eli, trudging across a violent America he cuts an enigmatic figure in a Mad Max world. The book of Eli wanders along and for the first part of the movie the viewer is not sure where the story is going to go. It's not until Gary Oldman as the evil Carnegie - ruler of a shanty town - gets involved that the story takes a very interesting turn. It's a stick-with-it movie with a nice twist in the tail ending. Our only criticism would be the ending drags on a bit.

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The Losers - 2010

After being betrayed and with an attempt on their lives, members of a CIA black ops team seek out those who targeted them for assassination. Starring Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Zoe Saldana, Chris Evans, Columbus Short, Oscar Jaenada and Idris Elba.

Oh, Idris Elba, after your powerful performance in The Wire that made you a man in demand and left us devoted fans, what were you thinking when you read this script? Did you not look at it and think, 'A van. A mature, smartly dressed, smooth-talking leader. An out-spoken black guy. a goofy, white guy. A good-looking, clever guy...mm, this reminds me of something.' Because you sure as hell should have. This badly written, badly cast A-Team wannabe movie that was loosely based on a comic book, cost £25 million to make and made less than $24 million at the box office. A turkey with all its trimmings. Idris Elba - you deserve better than this. A waste of a Saturday night.

1 elephant (and that's only because Idris Elba is in it)

Shooter

Ex-army marksman, Bob Lee Swagger, is living in exile when he is persuaded back into action after learning of a plot to kill the president. But ultimately framed for the attempted assassination he goes on the run to catch the real killer and find out who has set him up.

Rambo meets Jason Bourne. Which means lots of heads and arms being shot off but with a good story to accompany the blood lust. Basically one man's struggle against a powerful and corrupt system bent on framing him for something he didn't do. Who could he trust? Hell. We didn't know. The movie made us feel as uncertain as Swagger did himself. It kept us guessing. Would he outsmart the bad guy as he stepped into one trap after another? A movie that involved it's viewer - always a good thing. It's sustains tension and kept us guessing. And we so wanted Swagger to come out on top.

Best line: "You can's shoot me, I'm a U.S. senator."
"Exactly."
pow!

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The International

Interpol agent Louis Salinger (Clive Owen) and Manhattan D.A Eleanor Whitman (Naomi Watts) investigate one of the world's most powerful banks. Uncovering illegal activities that include money laundering and arms dealing, their investigation takes them across the world as they try to bring to justice a bank that will stop at nothing to continue to finance terror.

You must watch this film if only for the gun battle in the Guggenheim museum in New York - awesome! We watched this film a couple of months back and it was so impressive (not) we can't remember anything about it apart from that massive shoot out. So hardly a memorable film, then?

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Inside Man

From a cell, Dalton Russell (Clive Owen) tells us he carried out the perfect bank robbery and invites the audience to watch how he did it. But while he was committing the crime he had to outsmart Detective Frazier (Denzel Washington) and just to throw a little something else into the mix, the bank's president had something in the safe deposit box he was eager to protect. Enter Madeleine White (Jodie Foster) a high-powered fixer or as we like to think of her role ' the token bitch.'

Not your run of the mill cops and robbers film. The plot was fast paced, smart and very clever. The only spoiler - Jodie Foster's role in it. It could have been played by any actor. As good as Jodie Foster is, somehow she didn't bring anything to this film. Nevertheless, we loved this movie for it's originality and are pleased to hear they are making a sequel.

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The Sentinel

Peter Garrison (Michael Douglas) is a secret service agent and personal bodyguard to the First Lady of the United States, Sarah Ballentine (Kim Basinger) with whom he is having an affair. He finds himself embroiled in an investigation to an assassin plot against the President. Each agent is ordered to take a polygraph test and, because he has to hide his affair with the First Lady, he fails. Thus finding himself an unwitting suspect for providing information to the would-be assassins.

Rotten Tomatoes reviews this as a film as boring as watching ink dry on a U.N Treaty. Well stuff them. This actually wasn't that bad. Although it was slightly worrying that when looking at the DVD and seeing that the film starred Michael Douglas, Kiefer Sutherland and Eva Longoria...but somehow we'd never heard of it. Nevertheless, it was a good story, kept our attention and watching an OAP (Michael Douglas) beat up half of the U.S Secret Service was entertaining if not a little amusing. Watch but don't expect a classic.

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Jackie Chan's First Strike

Jackie Chan takes part in a sting operation on an international spy ring. But when one of them gets away he is chases him, and a missing nuclear warhead, to Australia.

We had this 1990's Jackie Chan movie sitting on our shelves gathering dust and had never watched it. So this weekend we decided to give it a view. It's only 88 minutes long but it's packed lots of action and the obligatory fight scenes Jackie is so famous for. In these depressing times when all everyone talks about is the economy and swine flu you can always reply on Jackie Chan to entertain and make you forget your problems.

3 elephants.

Quantum of Solace

Bond and "M" discover an international network of power and corruption. After an assassination attempt on "M" all roads appear to lead to a shady character called Dominic Greene(Mathieu Amalric). Greene, a developer of Eco friendly technology, is helping General Medrano stage a coup in exchange for a piece of barren Bolivian land. Only Bond assisted by his latest beautiful side-kick Camille(Olga Kurylenko), stand in Greene's way.

Daniel Craig reprises his role in this latest of the James Bond franchise. This James Bond seems hard and callous. He wouldn't take candy from a baby he'd shoot it in the head. We understand where his bitterness has come from (the death of Vesper in Casino Royale) but sometimes this Bond just seems a bit too nasty. But having said that it is a great movie and in many ways perhaps this edgier Bond is more appropriate for the times we live in.

3 elephants.

Eagle Eye

Jerry Shaw (Shia LaBouef) is a loser with a super successful twin brother. When his twin dies, strange things start to happen to Jerry at a dizzying pace. Soon Jerry and a complete stranger, Rachel Holloman (Michelle Monaghan) receive mysterious phone calls which throws them both together and pushes them both into ever increasing dangerous situations as they are chased across American by FBI Agent Thomas Morgan ( "musician" Billy Bob Thornton).

Eagle Eye was not on our list of must-see movies, but we are very glad we decided to watch it. This is an edge-of-your-seat thriller with an original script that holds your attention right to the end. The kind of movie that is so fast paced you are in danger of going into cardiac arrest. We loved it! A stampede of elephants could have raced across the room and we wouldn't have noticed.

We give it 4 elephants

Jet Li's Fearless (Huo Yuan Jia)

The true story of the Chinese martial arts master, Huo Yuan Jia. The founder of the Jin Wu Sports Federation.

Yeah, we know. Another Jet Li film. But we like him, okay?? Jet Li stars in this true story of the most famous fighter in all of China at the turn of the 20th century. Spectacular fight scenes and an absorbing story that highlights how the West affected the Chinese culture when it ploughed into China. Brilliantly acted with some very emotional scenes and amazing set pieces. This is a great film, despite the horrible haircuts! Humour aside, we highly recommend this film.

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The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor

Alex O'Connell (Luke Ford) the son of mummy fighters Rick (Brendan Fraser) and Evy (Maria Bello) O'Connell unearth the first Emperor of Qin with disasterous results.

You can't take a film like this seriously and you can't compare it to any other, because this is not what the film is about. It is simply a good 'ol family movie with great stunts. But we have to take issue with two things. Firstly, Rachel Weisz isn't in it and we missed her quirky take on the character. Maria Bello didn't bring anything to the movie. Secondly, c'mon now you casting people, are you serious? You cast Luke Ford as Brendan Fraser's son when in real life Luke is only thirteen years younger. The first thing we said when the movie started was that he looked way too old to play the son and that was a little distracting.

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The Forbidden Kingdom

After getting knocked out during a fight, a Kung Fu obsessed American teenager Jason Tripitikas (Michael Angarano) wakes up in ancient China where he meets Lu Yan (Jackie Chan) and sets about freeing the Monkey King (Jet Li).

The Forbidden Kingdom unites two of the most well known Kung Fu masters in an epic trip across China. More Hollywood family fun than martial arts masterpiece this movie knew wanted it wanted to be. But it's a shame it didn't go down the Crouching Tiger or House of Flying Daggers route because it would have been amazing. Oh, and by the way, after spending five minutes in China, Jason miraculously grew a ponytail...how?

2 elephants.

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

Famed archaeologist Dr Henry "Indiana" Jones is called back into action when he becomes entangled in a Soviet plot to uncover the secret behind the Crystal Skulls.

Rewind to 1981 when Indiana Jones burst onto the cinema screens and blew the cobwebs out of the movie business. Fast forward to 2008 and "Indy" is back. The movie business has moved on but Indiana Jones hasn't. BUT that isn't a bad thing because Indiana Jones has everything we've come to know and love from this movie franchise. Creepy crawlies, plunging waterfalls, death defying action scenes that are so ludicrous and yet so much fun to watch we don't care. Okay, there's perhaps too much CGI and the storyline is flimsy but we can't help but marvel at the intricate openings to doors and caves and the way Indiana drops over monumental waterfalls and still manages to keep his hat on. This movie is fast paced action and good, clean family fun. And when Indy's fedora blows to the feet of his son "Mutt" (played by Shia LeBeouf) we wonder if he will take up the mantle. We hope so.

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